I think we all know anecdotally if not empirically that fathers are important In the life of their child. It seems to me however, that the nature of that importance is not always understood, or appreciated. Fathers are absent from the lives of their children for various reasons. Avoidable reasons include divorce where the mother actively withholds a child from the father and out of wedlock births where the “father” is really just a biological donor.

There is a most interesting TEDx Talk that discusses the problem, and which is fairly entertaining to boot. Nevada Divorce lawyer Marilyn York highlights much of the problem, laced with statistics to make her point which is: too many fathers are absent from their child’s life, either entirely or to a significant extent, and this is an important failure with lifelong consequences for the child.

But first, what is a TEDx Talk (as opposed to a TED Talk?). Same format, just organized by a local group. View this one at:

The problems she describes are why in a mediation I try to encourage divorcing parents toward co-parenting where the children have the opportunity to grow up with the “permission” to love each parent without recrimination, and for each parent to be able to give that love without hesitation or reservation. Let’s make “best interest of the child” a real thing and not just a theory.

Nothing in Attorney York’s talk or in my mediation approach is to diminish mothers. Rather, it is to give both genders — where appropriate — equal opportunities to be a parent. Thank you Marilyn York for your talk.